The horrible stories of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s cheating and divorce are so prevalent in the media that they are unavoidable. However, I imagine many in the media are disappointed with the latest news that he is planning to give Maria a more than generous portion of the couple’s wealth to avoid going to court. Many reporters are speculating that Arnold is doing this to save his image from further damage. True or not, Arnold’s choice is probably the kindest he could now make for his children.
Children are often the biggest victims of a divorce. They bear no blame for their parents’ choices yet their lives are drastically changed forever. Just a few of the stresses a child will often bear in a divorce include not seeing mom and dad together anymore, a change in economic lifestyle, moving to new neighborhoods and having to divide time between different homes. Now imagine how much more stressful this all would be for a child if during all of this, the parents are fighting a bitter divorce and involving the children.
My parents divorced while I was in high school. Thankfully, my siblings and I were neither asked to choose sides nor told any bad information by one parent against the other parent. I am grateful that, even though it was a sad and stressful time, I was able to still be a kid, I was not asked to choose sides, and I felt free to love each parent just as much.
I am not saying that a divorcing parent should just roll over and take nothing or give everything up for the sake of the children. There are times to fight for what is fair. Children will suffer in a whole other way if Mom can’t meet her monthly bills or if the children are left with an abusive parent. In some cases I recommend stepping away from certain issues, and other times I recommend taking a more aggressive approach. Each situation is different. I give my clients advice and recommendations based on my years as an attorney, but my client is my boss. However, since I have personal experience from my parents’ divorce, I always encourage my client to keep the children in mind. If you or someone you know is going through a divorce or custody dispute and has any questions, please give me a call at (480) 833-1113.
